Tag Archives: little squirt

This is Why I Get Grey Hairs

Perhaps someone out there can settle a little debate I’ve got going on here. You see, Pte Goof will not allow me to get one of those leashes for Squirt. You know, those kid leashes so the little rascals can’t get away from you. I know, I know, some people really hate these things for various reasons. I certainly wouldn’t want to use it all the time. But there are particular situations where I think one would be just lovely. Like at the beach. I could plunk down close to the water, give him enough leash that he can just get to the edge of the water, and then I could actually relax on the beach rather than spend the entire time corralling Squirt. I’d still be right there, pretty much within arm’s reach, hearing and seeing and supervising, but I could actually sit down. I’d still get up and play with him all the fun games we play together at the beach, but I’d be able to take 10 or 15 minutes to sit and enjoy watching him without him taking off on me. This is just one example of when I think a leash would just make my time so much more enjoyable.

Now. Pte Goof on the other hand. Well, no son of his is going to wear some leash like a tied up animal. I know that quite a few people feel this way. No amount of “But I want to be able to enjoy myself” or “You’re away so often [like all last year until Sept], it gets so tiring to always be the one chasing him” or “It’s not like I’d use it all the time, or that I’d ignore him when I do” will sway him.

But, there is one huge but here. But, he has absolutely no problem making. our. son. dance. for. treats. just. like. his. mom’s. stupid. dog. And I mean just the same. He uses things like grapes and holds them over Squirt’s head and tells him to dance for it. Now how on Earth can he possibly say I’m the one who wants to treat our son like an animal? Not only that, but when I pointed out how that was treating him like an animal, which is exactly why I was forbidden to get a leash, he refused to stop doing it.

Common, someone’s got to agree with me that if Goof can do something so degrading to the poor boy I should be able to buy a little sanity with a leash…?

Confession

So I totally have a confession to make.

Squirt it still on the bottle.

He’s over 18 months now, and he still gets a bottle at nap time and another at bed time (and if I’m being totally honest, I still bring one with me to any event so I can give it to him if he just won’t shut up in a crowd! I know, lazy mothering or what?). Everything else is always in a sippy cup. He’s pro with a sippy. He’s been using them for months. And yet the bottle persists. I’m just not even sure how to get him to settle down to sleep without one. He’s pretty addicted to them too. Just mention the word bottle and he rushes over to the fridge to anticipate his next milky hit. If he sees one, you had better be planning on giving it to him, or you will feel his wrath!

I was on the bottle late too. My mom always says I was on it too long. She finally had to reason with me (because I was that old) and told me that once I chewed these nipples up (because I would walk around the house and chew them to bits) she wasn’t going to buy anymore. I remember using a bottle. No word of a lie. I can quite specifically remember how it felt in my hands.

I do feel better about it that Squirt doesn’t wander around with one all day. But I feel guilty about it. I just need to tough it out and teach him to go to sleep without one. But OMG it’s going to be a battle. He completely expects a bottle to help him drift off to sleep… sigh. I recently (as in yesterday)  cut it back to half a bottle instead of a whole. So far there’s been no problem with that. But he’s still getting that fix each time.

I’m not really sure what to do about it to be honest.

SURPRISE! not

Ok. So here’s a couple sentances that I think I have heard almost every single parent say. ‘I never knew how much I could love somebody until I had my baby’. ‘I knew it would be hard, but I had no idea how hard’. ‘I never realized how amazing it is to watch a tiny baby become a person’. Or any of the infinite variations of these words.

Not a single one of them applies to me.

I don’t know if it’s all the time I spent with kids beforehand or what. I mean, I know that I’m not the only parent who did tons of baby sitting before their own little one came along, but really, I have had very, very few surprises as  a parent (after, you know, unplanned pregnancy and him showing up 4 weeks early when Pte Goof and I didn’t have his room ready or even a name picked out yet lol).

When I first held Squirt and snuggled his tiny body to my chest and fell deeply in love with my baby, who still had no name, I never ever thought to myself Wow, who knew I could feel this way. Sure. It was a love unlike any love I had ever known, but it didn’t surprise me. The depth of emotion that this tiny bundle inspired in my very soul felt like it was always there, waiting. He just let it out.

When Squirt was too little because he was born early and his tiny body couldn’t stay awake to feed and we had such a hard time getting nursing under way I never felt surprised that he didn’t just latch on. Part of me was expecting trouble. I was hoping that we would get to breast-feeding with few problems, but I had heard of so many moms having so much trouble in the beginning, I half expected I would too.

When Squirt was just born and not sleeping and up all night and feeding every single hour all day long and pooping just about every second, sure it was hard. It was so hard. But I never thought to myself, OMG I had no idea it would be like this. Not even a wow, this is harder than I thought. It all felt like, well it’s a baby, this what babies do. (Not that I didn’t completely lose it at times, oh trust me, I did, just I expected to lose it haha).

Seeing how amazing it is to watch  Squirt grow into this funny little person doesn’t surprise me either. Sure, the kid surprises me every single day with some funny dance or new word, or new mess to get into, or new habit, or greater understanding of everything around him. But the process, and how incredible it all is… no surprise. It’s wonderful. Amazing. The best thing I have ever witnessed, but I always knew that watching my own child grow and change would be this spectacular.

I’m not trying to brag here. It’s certainly not like I have the answers or anything. I have plenty of insecurities as a parent. There are so many things that scare and worry me. It just has never been a moment of shock for me. Maybe that’s why when people ask me how I’m enjoying motherhood, my immediate answer is always, ‘I love it, I was born to be a mom.’

So have I gotten the wrong impression? Because it feels like every parent I talk to or have read talks about how much surprise there was for them in becoming a parent. Do many parents feel this surprise, or just the ones I know?

I wasn’t sure about posting this, and even as I’m posting it, I’m still not sure. I really don’t want to sound like I’m bragging. I don’t want to sound all self-confident, there are a million and one things that I’m terrified about when it comes to parenthood, it just doesn’t surprise me

Catching Up

So Hello there.

I’ve been gone SO long, I know. And it wasn’t even announced. I’m sorry. Forgive me?

So what has happened since I blogged last? Well tons and at the same time nothing at all. There hasn’t been too much that I felt blog worthy as of last (part of the reason for all the silence). I’ve visited Pte Goof twice, and he’s come home twice since then (I know, we’ve seen so much of him lately! It’s been awesome!). Squirt’s growing like crazy. We’re at the point that anyone who sees little kids regularly upon finding out how old is he say ‘Wow, he sure is tall!’ (which my mom says she got all the time when I was a his age, and I’m pretty tall now).  Pte Goof and I went to a stag and doe of some mutual friends, and I got completely hammered. Like the drunkest I have ever been in my entire life. I made a fool of myself. Hmm… but that’s about it.

Goof just came home for the long weekend. The weather was gorgeous and we had an absolutely lovely weekend. I just got back from dropping him off where he was meeting his friend for a ride back (yay for that, save us the $60 bus and $20 cab it takes for him to get back to base! both ways!!). Poor squirt. He’s starting to get it. He’s beginning to understand that when we say ‘bye-bye’ to daddy it’ll be a long time before we see him again. He cried and cried as Pte Goof drove away. Broke my heart twice. Once cause he was leaving, once cause it made Squirt so sad.

I’ll try to be back again soon! I don’t know what it is, when I’ve been away a while it’s so hard to start again… but once I’m here it’s like, wow! I’ve missed this!!

Mission Accomplished!

I meant to write about this yesterday, but I didn’t get around to it. Remember how I talked about how I was trying to push Squirt’s nap-time from morning to afternoon so he wouldn’t such a monster come bedtime because he refuses a second nap? well yesterday I finally did it! yay! I fed him lunch at 11:55, and he napped straight afterwards! And let me tell you, he was ready for a sleep by then!

Today was the same, lunch came and went, then off to bed for a nice long nap. Changing the time has been a little frustrating, but totally worth it because he is no longer so tired by bedtime that he just doesn’t even know what to do with himself. Sigh. It’s a bit of a relief really.

Yay for victories 🙂

Jinxed

So remember how I opened my big mouthhere and totally bragged about how great this time change had been and how I was getting extra sleep? Well yeah, I totally jinxed it, as I predicted.

Last night Squirt was super tired. We had gone on a little walk (where I actually let him walk on the sidewalk instead of in the stroller or the backpack) after supper, and although he loved every minute of it, it totally tuckered him out. Once we got home about 45 minutes before bedtime he was totally done in. 15 minutes later when he pulled me over to his crib and babbled incoherently, but in very distressed tones while pointing inside I figured that even though it was half on hour early he was totally ready for bed now. And he was. Jammies, bottle, story, out. No problem.

Until this morning when he woke up 2 and a half hours early.

Combine that with the fact that Pte Goof was up with the same cold we have (we were kind enough to share with him before we left our last visit), and decided to text me at 1:30 am because I’m usually still up (but of course, last night, since I was sick I was actually able to get to sleep for a change) and woke me, and I’m pretty darn tired.

When Squirt goes down for his nap I’m going to see if I can get one in too. Tonight we have plans to have dinner with my MIL, but if I feel like this I may just postpone until tomorrow, she’ll understand, she knows we’re both sick.

Time Change

I’m sure now that I’m saying it out loud I will totally jinx it, but this time change has been wonderful! It has come at the perfect time!

I say this because since Squirt is sick I’ve had no problems getting him to go to bed at the new time, but he’s still waking up at the old time! You read that right! I’m now getting an extra (very needed) hour of sleep a night! It’s very needed because as I’ve mentioned before I have major issues falling asleep when Pte Goof’s not here (I feel so lame when I say that, but it’s true), and am awake way too late every night. No matter what time I got to bed.

The new schedule is also helping me move Squirt’s only nap from morning to the afternoon, which I have tried to do for a few weeks now. Since he’s getting up an hour later, and has an hour more sleep it’s not very hard to keep him up longer in the morning. the reason I’m trying to shift his nap is because he’s such a super naper, he’ll nap anywhere from an hour and a half to three (!) hours. But then there’s no way you’re going to get a second nap in. When that one and only nap is from 10-1, it makes it a long haul to get to bedtime, and he’s super tired and a little cranky by the end of the day. I’d like to get to the point where I feed him lunch at noon and nap right after, and we’re getting super close!

I don’t know if this will stick once he’s feeling better, but for now it’s fabulous!