Old Friends, or Something Like That

So I have this friend from high school. We had a few classes together throughout our high school careers. I never ever hung out with him outside of school, or even outside of class really, but we got along. We used to flirt like mad (back when I used to flirt with any single guy who would give me the time of day). But he’s well… awkward. Like extremely awkward. He doesn’t quite get social cues. It’s kind of hard to explain.

Anyway, he moved to Guelph, and I haven’t seen him for 3 years, but we talk occasionally on msn. 2 weeks ago he broke his wrist while rollerblading and decided to come home to his parent’s place for a bit since he can’t work and his dominate hand is busted. He insisted that I come out to see him with Squirt since he was in the area. I was hesitant, because although we got along in high school, well to be honest, he’s pretty annoying (I don’t quite get this relationship to be honest with you, in some ways I just can’t stand the guy, but we used to get along so well, and it’s not like he’s changed he’s always been awkward and annoying…)  but he insisted. I was talking to my other bff (I don’t talk about her much on here, but she’s totally the best person ever, and a huge part of my life, she totally deserves her own name here) about this and we wondered how he does it. A few years ago he happened to be in the same province for the summer that she was living in at the time and he totally talked her into driving an hour to see him. Even though she didn’t want to either. Neither of us could figure out how he talks people into these things. I mean, he’s a nice enough guy, it’s not like he’s an ahole or anything, just… well irritating.

So Squirt and I drove the 25 minutes to go see him. I really didn’t want to, but I figured, hey, he’s been bugging me to come visit him in Guelph for like a year now, maybe I can get a visit over with now, and then soon I’ll be moving out of province and it’ll be done.

15 minutes after getting there he started. The tickley, touchy way that we used to behave. You know, back when we were 16 and both single, and it was just silly fun? But we’re not 16 anymore. And I’m not single. It wasn’t like the whole time, just here and there, but It made me so uncomfortable. I’m a 23-year-old mom to a toddler and engaged. I mean, common. But I’m ashamed to admit I didn’t say anything. I certainly didn’t encourage it. I did my best to make it obvious that I wasn’t enjoying it without actually saying it. But I should have. I should have said something. I am engaged for crying out loud. This is no longer appropriate! But, like the chickenshit I am, I didn’t say anything.

He also got mad when I talked about my plans with Pte Goof to likely move to Alberta. He got all pissed off about Pte Goof putting the military ahead of his family. I tried to explain that part of the reason he wants to do well in the military is for his family. I mean sure, it’s partly selfish too because it’s his dream, but obviously when he does well it gives us advantages too. And we decided Alberta was the best for his career. I understand that he’s an old friend and he feels a certain amount of protectiveness or whatever for me, but really, who the hell is he to get mad because Pte Goof and I decided together to move to Alberta?

So now I feel bad. I feel like I didn’t stick up enough for Goof, and I know I should have said something to this guy about how he was tickling me. So I ask you, how should I have dealt with this? What should I have said without being a total bitch to clue him into the fact that I’m at a very different spot in my life than when we sat at the back of biology and he tickled my knees under the lab counter?

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2 responses to “Old Friends, or Something Like That

  1. i think that there’s no polite way of saying it… if you explained that you want your fianceé to be succesful in his career, and that you don’t mind moving away with and for him… then he’s an idiot

    just let it pass… ignore him on msn and he’ll forget…

    • haha, oh, trust me, he won’t forget. But I was more getting at the unwanted tickling. I mean if a stranger or someone I just met started tickling me you sure as hell bet I would tell that that wasn’t cool, but this used to be the norm for us, and I just didn’t know what to say to him. It’s not cool for him to touch me like that anymore…

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